Today's the day! My chance of sight is here
This is such a big day for me! Today is the one year anniversary from when I had my emergency cornea transplant and the day that my specialist can look at my graft and decide how many stitches I can get out. It's such a big day that I've asked my dad to come with me and share the news. Dad was the one who drove me to Sydney and stayed with me for the procedure and he's been there with me through this whole journey, so it seemed fitting to have him at this milestone appointment.
I did my meditation this morning and am feeling all connected and zen. I asked my angels and guides to be with me today and allow the best outcome possible for my stitch removal. The last plan was to have 2 or 3 stitches removed today and then the 4 in the next appointment, but you never know you're luck and today I hoped we could do more. Imagine being able to see again? How exciting, how amazing! Imagine the independence I could regain? Imagine the reduced pain and headaches and possibly being able to return to study or socialise again? Ah life would be great!
I eagerly sat in the waiting room, like a kid at Christmas, excited for what could be. I posted my excitement on facebook so that all my friends and family could share the day with me. The specialist called me in and he went straight to suture removal! Wow! He collected the tweezers and scissors and I held my breath as he positioned himself to remove the first suture! He looked at my eye and said that he'll start at two and if I can tolerate the pain and my eye holds up then he will remove up to seven sutures today. Oh my god! Dad and I were so excited! Thank you god! thank you angels and guides and everyone else I've prayed to over the last while.
I sat back in the chair and looked up at the bright light of the ophthalmology machine as the specialist put in a drop or two of a numbing agent. It stung a bit as it kicked in but the excitement was still more powerful. I had taken a panadeine forte before the appointment as I knew the first few hours after the stitch removal was quite painful. The specialist held my eye open and I focused on the bright light as his hand moved closer to my eye with those sharp scissors. A couple of snips later and the first two sutures were cut! I'm so focused on not blinking or moving my eye that I've forgotten to breathe, taking in short gasps, but not enough to replenish my lungs. Then he picks up the tweezers and carefully removes each end of the two sutures.
He sits back and asks me how I'm feeling. I take the biggest breath and we all laugh at me not breathing. It's such a relaxed atmosphere, it's a big deal and the most important day of this journey yet, but I feel good. He asks me how I'm feeling and if I'm ok for him to remove any more. Hell yes! Go for it doc!
He continues and removes a total of eight sutures! That's massive. I'm beyond excited. The specialist explains that he has now removed EVERY stitch that will give me sight. There are now a total of 11 left and 11 have been removed since October last year. The remaining 11 will stay in indefinitely as they shouldn't affect my vision or cause any pain and he prefers to do as much as he can to lower the risk of rejection.
My dad and I are almost in disbelief when he says that I can come back in six weeks and he expects to be able to fit glasses! He expects my graft eye to have as much vision as my right eye, which is only shadows and splotches of colour without glasses, and with my uber magnified glasses I can see most things - so that is freakin awesome! He expects that once my graft eye is able to see that it will take the pressure off my right eye and all of the twitches and pain I've gone through for the last 12 months will settle.
I might just be getting my life back. Wow!
I take another panadeine forte to help me on the two hour drive home, but the pain of eight stitches is quite strong. I can feel the scratchiness of the 16 holes in my eye and it burns and burns. I decide I want some mummy love and caring tonight, so dad drops me off at mums so that I don't have to face the pain alone. I'm so lucky to have two parents who are here for me. Love you guys.
Can't wait for the next few days as I test out my new cornea and see the world unfold before me!